The dream was so vivid that I can still remember a few but important details.
It started with myself with some important people to me at the airport. Apparently I was flying out as there was something about my career that needed to bring me there. Then after scenes of myself inside the airplane, there I was, in some country I believe is in Europe. In my dream I was inside a cafe having a chat with the waiter in the local language I can't seem to decipher what it could be. But I think the topic was interesting that the waiter decided to take the seat with me as I was by my lonesome. It was cold, as I was still wearing layers even if inside the cafe. Soon, my brother arrived with a close friend whom I haven't seen for a long while now and haven't even talked to. So it was me, my brother, my friend and the waiter having some chat inside the cafe. Some time after, it started to snow heavily and then this is what made it weird: my ex appeared.
First, he was just outside looking through the cafe's glass panel, and maybe since he saw me, he decided to come in. And then and there all of us were having a good time amid the cold. Until my ex and I had to excuse ourselves when the snow stopped. As soon as we went out of the cafe, he threw his arms around me so quick and hugged me tight that it was impossible to breathe. Then the next scene of the dream was me and him lying in my bed. Then this was when I woke up.
It doesn't end there. When I woke up, I looked at my phone to check the time when I saw I also had one message coming from my ex.
Here's the deal. I haven't made contact to my ex for such a long time already. Even if we're in good terms, and we're both happy for each other, the last time I saw him was before he left for Korea. And the last time we've spoken or talked was two years ago. He's Korean, actually. And the reason why we haven't talked is because he was doing his military service which started in 2009. But last week, he got discharged. He's not in the Philippines. And we didn't meet here, we met in Brunei.
Anyway, guess what he messaged me. "Hey! How are you? Just to let you know, I've already been out of the service since last week. Telling you now because I actually had a dream of you last night..."
It's weird how your subconscious plays on you.
Anyway, I'm sorry I haven't been updating that often again. I'm not really busy but I'm at this point in time that I'm losing the drive to write in my blog. I don't know why. Maybe because I'm having these episodes again? If you also have the same thing that I'm having, I guess you know how it feels when you have it?
Honestly, I want to tolerate my feelings when I feel what I feel.
Sometimes I go whole days listening, bored, half sleep
I won't say anything that's worth a thing to me
One day, suddenly, time took a turn that once felt so brief
I blinked to see polite ghosts fading quickly
What begins as an unguarded train of thought slowly can become
An addiction to the slumber of disconnection
And the resonance of memory that no longer has a shape
But keeps you numb through the hours till gone is another day
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